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Newfie Jokes

Did you hear about the Newfie terrorist who tried to blow up a school bus?
He burnt his lips on the exhaust pipe.

Did you hear about the Newfie who died drinking milk?
The cow fell on him.

How many Newfies does it take to go ice fishing?
Four. One to cut a hole in the ice and three to push the boat through.

Did you hear about the Newfie who went ice fishing?
He caught fifty pounds of ice and his wife drowned trying to cook.

There was a guy from Ontario, a guy from Quebec and a guy from Newfoundland and they all went to a strip joint. At the strip joint there was a beautiful stripper. She went up to the guy from Ontario and waved her butt in his face, so he slipped her $30. She thought maybe if she waved her butt in this other guys face she could get another $30 so she did it and he slipped her $30. The she thought if she waved her butt in the newfie's face she could get another $30 so she waved her butt in the newfies face and the newfie pulled out his credit card, swiped her crack and took the two thirtys.
[Submitted by Scott Hopkins]

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